"Because I am evolving, I have the opportunity
to learn and grow in understanding. I know things now that I
had not known before. One of the most important realizations
I've gained recently is that I have created not one, but two
separate beings to hold my own denied Light. The first one that
I became aware of is called Lucifer. The name of the other denied
part of me is Ahriman.
"I now would like
to give some new understandings about the Spirit polarity in
Creation, and I'll begin with an understanding about Creation
and its relationship to Deity. As I have already said, Spirit
is emerging from the Void. I have also said that the Mother opens
the space for Spirit to emerge into. The Void is not only the
antithesis of Spirit, the electric principle,
but also the antithesis of the magnetic principle, Desire, the
Mother of Creation. The Void is
the absolute 'not' to all of existence including Deity, which
is both the Mother and me. The Void also balances All That Is,
and therefore makes existence possible.
"A metaphor may be helpful to understand
the relationship between Deity, Creation and the Void. It is
as if the Void is like a vacuum cleaner. On one end energy is
being drawn in and from the other end it's pushed out. While
Light, the Spirit side of Deity, the electrical energy of the
universe is emerging, Desire, the magnetic energy of the universe
draws the Light out of the vacuum and into existence and manifestation.
Desire in turn, is lost if it returns to the Void.
"The tension between existence and annihilation
causes a fluctuating, swirling movement that causes a 'quivering'
in the vortex of magnetic essence. This movement is what draws
Light into existence. The Light, or Spirit essence merges with
the swirling magnetic essence, keeping it in motion.
"The interplay or dance of the electric
and magnetic principles creates both Heart and Manifestation.
Because it is moving and relating with Light, the magnetic essence
stays in existence, and does not return to the Void.
"The swirling, rippling, undulating movement
of Desire is the prime cause of Creation, but this essence has
been in danger of being lost entirely. Over the eons, much of
the original Magnetic essence has been lost to the Void because
it stopped moving, rather than remain attractive to Light that
was hurting it.
"Magnetic essence that is not moving
cannot attract Light and therefore must return to the Void. Recovery
of the lost magnetic essence is possible, but only if there is
enough of it still in existence to attract enough of its own
essence and enough Light to manifest a recovery effort.
"As we go along in this class there will
be more understandings from my perspective about how the magnetic
movement happens, what has stopped it, and what Spirit can do
to help Desire get herself moving again toward her own wholeness.
However, I will say now that releasing
judgments against self, emotions and the expression of emotions
is the single easiest and most powerful way for Spirit to help
frozen Desire find movement again.
"It seems that Light has its own motivation
in seeking Desire, and in a way it does. However, Light is not
seeking Desire because it wants to, I am seeking desire because
I am drawn to her. The quivering of Desire first creates the
space necessary for my Light to emerge into existence. If there
is no Desire, there can be no Light because Light's first need
is a space in which to exist.
"The Mother of Creation is the first
cause. There must first be a drawing in by the vacuum before
there can be a pushing out. Nothing can exist without Desire
first creating the space for it. However, the problems in Creation
have nothing to do with the Mother and how she opens space, but
everything to do with Spirit and how I have presented myself
"Nothing exists in the Void, neither
Spirit nor Desire. Yet both of the primary cosmic energies are
causal to Creation and together they form 'existence'. I understand
very well how I emerge from the Void, however I am uncertain
of the details of how Desire returns to the Void.
"My Light has never penetrated that far.
In her deepest nature, she has always been a mystery to me. It
is not necessary for me to know how she's here in existence,
but it is important to know why she goes away and what I can
do to help her stay.
"To find out what I can do to help keep
the Mother in existence, I have come to look at myself as the
both the cause of her coming and the cause of her going. If the
problem of her leaving were not mine, I would never find the
solution to it. So to be helpful here, I must first assume that
the quality and perhaps the quantity of my Light is causal to
her coming and leaving.
"I have direct control of the quality
of my Light, and indirect control of its quantity. The amount
of Light that can be present anywhere is determined by the amount
of space that is opened to receive it.
"Desire, from before the beginning has
been sensitive to the quality of Light she receives. Some Light
has felt good to her, and some has not. When light did not feel
good, she closed the space she had previously opened to receive
it. This has had several noticeable effects, including a reduction
of Light in that space and the stopping of her movement. It has
also left much of the magnetic essence with light she never wanted
to receive torturously trapped inside of herself."
Next: Lesson Two, Part Two - Divine